While often confused with the concept of situationships, hookup culture is strictly sexual rather than emotional. To put it into view, the term “hooking up” regards the idea of having a sexual relationship without having to deal with feelings. This includes circumstances like one-night stands, friends with benefits, or just having casual sex to have casual sex. However, are we viewing these relationships with too much value?
In recent years, the act of “hooking up” has been praised and normalized. It has become associated with empowerment and encouragement, emphasizing the “free spirit” ideology. Yes, it is entirely plausible that having sex without strings attached may bring someone a sense of confidence. In hindsight, the underlying toxicity within hookup culture is causing detrimental damage to our concept of romantic relationships.
As a society, we have begun prioritizing sexual pleasure over emotional intimacy. Sex has essentially become king. The phrase “sex sells” has been circulating for decades. If it turns you on, it’s popular. This led to a massive intake of sexual content. We have become desensitized as a society from said content due to intense exposure taking place in the current media. Not to mention the easy access to pornography in general. This specific strain of content has infected Gen Z in particular, completely morphing the perspective of sex. It is something that is now commonly sought out, and lust has taken over the needs of many people. What used to be seen as an act of love and intimacy has become a laid-back pastime for most.
The double standards regarding gender roles in hookup culture also add to the stigma. When a man says he partakes in casual sex with different partners, he is often praised for it. Women are often put down in these circumstances, getting labeled with a multitude of derogatory terms. More commonly known as “slut shaming”. Based on an academic journal, Pathways of Self Determination, from England and Bearak, their research data has shown that there is a double standard when it comes to heterosexual and cisgender men and women being openly sexually active. It’s not out of the ordinary that you’ll be asked the question of “What’s your body count?” The reactions may vary, but more often than not, the answer will sway someone’s opinion.
The act of “hooking up” within hookup culture can also be dangerous. Not just physically but also emotionally. When you’re partaking in casual sex, especially with partners you don’t know well, the knowledge you have on their sexual history is limited. Safe sex is key. Casual sex makes spreading STDs and other infections incredibly easy, especially if multiple partners are involved. Not only is using physical protection important, protecting your mental health is as well. The clichés of hookup culture play on avoidance, and in these situations someone always gets hurt. From sneaking out the morning after to not receiving a text back, these tactics can cause great emotional harm. Whether that be a friends-with-benefits situation, someone always wants more and usually ends up getting hurt.
On the surface, hookup culture can seem great. Meeting your desires and fulfilling your sexual needs without the hassle of a romantic relationship sounds like a good idea. However, once you dig beneath the surface and get into the thick of it, someone always tends to get hurt. Staying informed and being safe is what matters the most. Have fun, but keep in mind the toxicity that comes with the pleasures of hookup culture.